Wax Mama Charlotte “an inbox full of charlotte awesome…”

Celeb Extra – That’s What She Said

Today is truly special.  It’s a “Celeb Extra” because I just made a discovery that simply cannot stay hidden.  Last week I (Brooke) was set up on a blind date.  I went obviously not knowing what to expect, but realized quickly that this was no ordinary guy.  OK, so, I’m sure you’ve all heard of Tiger Woods and his mountain of “lady-hos.”  However, do you also remember back in May during the local Quail Hollow Championship when every sportscaster on the planet went insane over that guy in the crowd that heckled Tiger?  I believe it went something like, “Get in the hole!” then, “That’s what she said!”  It was all over ESPN, the newspapers, the internet… everywhere.  And, it was awesome.  So, what do you want to bet that here I was, sitting across the table from him… The Heckler.  This was just too good to keep to myself.  So, here’s his story in his own words…

PROFESSION: Risk Management; Insurance
AGE: 37
WHERE DO YOU LIVE? Charlotte
YOUR FAVORITE THING IN THE QC: Panthers, Carowinds, Lake Norman, and all the good eats in town.

So, first of all, what happened that day out on the course? What happened is pretty much what was said in the news articles. I told a buddy of a buddy I would buy him a beer if he yelled “Get in the hole!” when Tiger started his putt.  He knew I was up to something but didn’t know me well enough to know what was coming next.  So, right after he yelled it I screamed, “That’s what she said,” at the top of my lungs.  I mean, he deserves it man.  The best, however, was immediately after it happened when Quail security and CMPD were all over us.  They were like monkeys falling out of trees.   I don’t know where they all came from.  They knew someone in our group had said it but I wasn’t about to admit it.  People were pointing in our direction but nobody singled us out.  I slowly walked off and then realized I was the only one who had left.  So fearing that I would look obvious, went back to the scene where my buddy’s coworker admitted to yelling “Get in the hole!”  Then, a police officer grabbed my upper arm and said “Are you the one that said ‘That’s what she said?’”  It was funny as hell, but there was no way I was going to get caught, so I laughed and told him that I wish I had been quick enough to think of something that funny. Then, I walked off. By the time I got in line for a beer about ten yards away, people were already talking and asking me if I had heard about it.   I just laughed and said “No, what happened?!”  It was just too funny.  I couldn’t believe how fast the media picked it up.  It was everywhere, immediately.  I guess you could say that it was my fifteen minutes of (anonymous) fame.

What do you wear to bed? Boxers.
Do you smoke when no one is watching? Absolutely.
Tell us about the last time you got arrested? I was with a bunch of party people who were pumping their fists like this (insert fist pump here).  No, in all seriousness I used to be involved in a Russian mail order bride scam.
Do you throw litter out the window of your car? Only when I am in Afghanistan.  Where IS that guy?
What do you do when you’re all alone at home? Lay on the couch and watch Sports Center.
What is your biggest vice? Miami.
Have you ever been in a physical fight? Does going to a Phish show while being spun like Re-run with hundreds of people throwing marshmallows at one another count?
Have you ever flirted (or more!) with the opposite sex to get a job? Of course.  Why wouldn’t ya???
If you had $1,000 that you had to spend today on someone else, what would you buy? Whatever she wanted.
If you could have a magical power, what would it be? I already do.  Can you guess what it is?
Tell us about a time you lied to cover your own rear. I don’t lie, I laugh.
What do you most like about your appearance? My smile and the fact that I will never be bald.
On what do you spend too much money? Fireworks.
What’s the craziest thing you’ve ever done for money? Vegas, baby yea.
Where would we typically find you on a Saturday night? Schmoozin’ and boozin’ with great friends.
What do you eat more of than anything else? There’s nothing better that a great steak.
Have you ever broken someone’s heart? Sure. I think it is only a natural part of life. Who hasn’t?
What is it that you most dislike? Intolerance and closed minds.  There’s just no room for it.
What is the last thing you did that was truly awesome? A date this past Wednesday night.
What is your biggest regret? Conforming to what’s expected.  The South will suck you in.